Reflection 4

I feel in a much better place about the direction my work has taken in the last few weeks. What was meant to be a side project alongside my Stanley Kubrick project has become my best work. I've made it my main project because I'm more excited by it and my responses to my Kubrick project ideas weren't having the impact I'd envisaged.

My new direction has allowed me to use my strengths and the work has flowed much better. I've focused on the subjects I'm passionate about focusing on the shift in society towards climate change and our new perspective of how we look after the planet and it's species. 

It's been liberating using collage because it's allowed me to reflect on and express my views on these subjects much more effectively. I wouldn't of been able to get across the sharper, darker tones of my views just using drawings. My collage has a 'f*ck you' edge (my girlfriend's description) to it, a humour and a reflection of my personality. The collages are a combination of my desire to make something beautiful that brings pleasure to people but also with a message that was lacking before. 

I realised I was using cliched motifs of native american culture and slightly shoehorning them into other Shining references. It wasn't interesting enough to just draw Shelley Duvall and stick native American clothes on her. It was saying the opposite to what I think about the film which I thought was a beautiful film that needs a more in depth analysis and a fresh opinion to say about the film rather than pointing out the flawed interpretations of others. Also the themes of the Native American genocide in the film were serious subjects that I was on the verge of trivialising with lighthearted drawings. 

My partner has been really influential in helping my practice. She's honest and critical in a useful way about what she thinks of my work and her positive reaction to the new work along with friends has been a massive boost. Most importantly I'm enjoying my own work and not stressing as much in general. It's also been a proper reminder of the importance of making work for things you're passionate about. I've definitely felt the stress lately and it feels like a much needed breakthrough which is a relief. It can be a lonely place when you're not happy with your work and can't see a way of resolving it. 

Using collage again has allowed me to experiment combining typography with my work. I'm able to use the warm hues and colour schemes I prefer too and offset that warmth with the darker humour that was absent before. I need to start seeing myself as a creative worker with multiple skills covering multiple areas such as graphic design, rather than restricting myself by thinking 'I just do the pictures'. Labelling myself as a singular thing has held my practice back and I've realised I'm able to use type effectively and use it as visual tool that works alongside my artwork. I feel more optimistic and confident about expanding the range of disciplines I can work in, in the future.